The First Time
by Bontaque
Summary: Saying I love you can be hard, it can feel like forever when you're waiting to hear it and then neither of you can remember why you hadn't said it from the start.
1. Chapter 1

Mike cleared his throat. Harvey was standing up against the window, looking out across the city and he just wanted to walk over and wrap his arms around him but he couldn't. Not here. Even if they had told everyone they were dating, Mike was pretty certain that public displays of affection were a no go with Harvey. At least not at work. They had to keep it professional. He hadn't really approached the subject of making their relationship public, he didn't know how to, he didn't even know if Harvey was _out_. He certainly hadn't known until he was being pulled back into the car after Harvey had offered him a lift home, until he had kissed him (on the cheek, ever the gentleman) and asked him if he'd like to, on second thoughts, come home with him instead.

That had been three weeks ago and Mike had stayed at Harvey's more nights than he hadn't. Harvey had even taken him out to dinner a few times, refusing to let him pay by making sure Mike couldn't afford the places he took him to. Harvey turned around, crooking an eyebrow over Mike's shoulder. Donna was probably watching them. She, alone, knew of their budding romance, as she liked to call it. Harvey had sworn that he hadn't told her and Mike believed him; she was Donna, it was to be expected.

"I was just wondering if I should make my own arrangements to get home tonight," Mike said.

"You're not going home tonight," was Harvey's reply and there was a flutter in Mike's stomach that made him feel like a teenager.

"I... don't have any more clean suits at yours."

"Then we can swing by yours and then you can come back to mine so I can cook you dinner."

Mike just smiled. He had struggled being the girl in the relationship at first, but it was nice being wooed by Harvey. Not that he needed to do anything. The smile, the wit, the _body, _oh god the first time Mike had seen him naked, he'd stood there with his mouth agape for much too long to be cute.

"Ray is picking me up at 7, will you be ready by then?"

"Of course," Mike said with a quick smile. He'd have to skip any breaks he'd been planning to take, but he didn't want to look incompetent. Somehow, when they'd gotten together, his need to impress Harvey had only increased.

At ten to 7, Mike was finishing the last page of his briefs. He'd somehow made it. At five to, he had handed the briefs to Louis, had shrugged off his comments about Mike rushing out on him and he was ready. He grabbed his bag and met Harvey at the lift. People must have thought that they'd had some kind of fight because they'd actually been spending less time together and giving each other the appropriate amount of personal space for once. Mike was fine with it. If Harvey was happy, he was happy.

As soon as the door of the car clicked closed and they'd greeted Ray, they were kissing. Nothing too obscene, not yet. Just kisses of _hello_ and _I missed you today _and _I hope the traffic isn't bad, I want to get back to yours._ When the car stopped for the first time, Mike was disappointed. He'd forgotten that he had to pick up his clothes.

"Bring a few nights worth, okay?" Harvey said as he got out of the car.

He was as quick as he could be without creasing anything. He grabbed his toothbrush, so he wouldn't have to use the disposable he'd been using, his razor, for the same reason and a bottle of lube because they were almost out.

He was back in the car within minutes and Harvey just placed his hand on his in a way that told him that he didn't have to worry if they weren't public yet. He cared and that was all that mattered.


	2. Chapter 2

"Harvey... Just tell me."

Mike was sitting on the balcony, as he'd been instructed. Harvey wasn't telling him what he was cooking and it was starting to make him nervous. What if he didn't like it? It smelled delicious... there were definitely tomatoes involved because he could smell them and he was pretty sure he'd seen some when he'd tried to sneak a peek.

"Be patient. It'll only be another fifteen minutes," Harvey called. "Are you okay out there? Cold? Thirsty?"

"I'm okay. Just a little lonely," Mike replied hopefully. Harvey appeared at the door and Mike just laughed.

"An apron? Really?"

"Do you want me to get food on this suit?"

Harvey walked towards him and pulled him out of the chair, kissing him on the forehead gently. He was different to how he'd imagined. Sure, Harvey could be forceful in the bedroom (or wherever else they happened to be having sex) but Mike was pretty sure he'd once told him that he was against having emotions. They looked out across the city together, with Harvey pressed up against his back, his head crooked slightly to come to reast on his shoulder. Mike had discovered early on that this was something Harvey loved to do and he could see why. The city was a thing of beauty, especially at night. The lights and the movement, it was almost as if it was alive. Harvey pressed another soft kiss on his jaw and pulled away.

"Let me get back to the kitchen. Not long now, I promise."

Mike was nervous again. What if it was too fancy? On their first date, Harvey had convinced him to try oysters and had laughed at the face he'd pulled. He waited patiently until he heard the clattering of something being taken out of the over. Cheese, he was pretty sure there was cheese. Harvey appeared at the door again and the apron was gone, as was the suit. He was wearing a dark brown shirt with light brown pinstripes, one button undone. He was holding the tie he'd been wearing earlier (emerald green, one of Mike's favourites) and he walked forwards and pressed it onto Mike's eyes.

"Come on, Harv, tell me what it is."

Harvey just chuckled and tied the tie around his head. Mike heard footsteps, more clattering and then the footsteps returned. Something was set down onto the table and Mike had to assume that it was a tray of some kind; Harvey had already set the table with plates and cutlery. He felt the tie being loosened and for a second time that evening, he couldn't help but laugh.

"Pizza?"

It didn't look like anything he'd ever ordered, sure, but Harvey had just made a big song and dance about pizza and that was wonderful.

"It'll be the best pizza you've ever had," Harvey said, sitting down and pulling a piece onto his plate. "Oh and Mike? Yes, you have to use the cutlery."

He sighed and pulled a piece towards him, stopping when he noticed something.

"Is there a problem?" Harvey asked.

"Harvey... There's cheese _in the crust," _Mike replied and Harvey just grinned. It wasn't just Mike that could remember things.


	3. Chapter 3

The pizza had been perfect. Mike didn't even know pizza could taste that good but now it was gone and Harvey was sitting across from him looking like he had something to say. That was all it took for Mike's heart to be in his mouth. It couldn't be anything bad, could it? No, if it was bad, Harvey wouldn't have asked him to stay over, he wouldn't have kissed him like that. He had to be logical about this, he had to, but he couldn't help thinking about the times when he'd been told the same things. _I don't think this is working. I don't want this like you do._

"Mike, are you okay?" Harvey asked. He looked concerned, caring. This couldn't be bad news.

"I'm... fine. You were just, uh, you looked like you had something to say," Mike replied. "It looked serious."

"Calm down, it's... I do. Would you rather I didn't say it?"

"What? I don't know what it is."

"You don't?" Harvey looked genuinely shocked.

"Is it bad? Are you breaking up with me?"

"No!" Harvey was standing now and Mike was trying to stop his hands from shaking. When Harvey reached him, he pulled him into an embrace of sorts, the height difference from Mike sitting down making it more of a head cradle. Mike stood up and looked at Harvey, feeling nervous and stupid and confused all at the same time.

"How could you think I could be breaking up with you?" Harvey asked, pressing a kiss to his lips that stopped his trembling.

"I... don't know. You just looked so serious."

"Mike... I just drafted two emails when I was in the kitchen. I wanted to ask for your permission before I sent them."

"What? Why? Who are they for?" Mike was confused again. What kind of emails would Harvey need to ask him about?

"One is to Jessica, detailing the boundaries of our relationship and assuring her that it will not get in the way of our work. The other is to Donna, asking her to make sure that people find out about us in the right ways. If I send one, or both, it is up to you. I should probably send that one to Jessica sooner rather than later, though. You'll have some paperwork to sign, but other than that, I don't think she'll mention it. So, what do you think? Would you be okay with people knowing?"

Mike's relief must have showed on his face because Harvey was squeezing his hand, his eyes twinkling.

"Of course! Yes, send them both. I just thought you wouldn't want people to know..." Mike said, glad that the topic had finally been brought up.

"Well, you're right, I don't usually like to share my personal life. But what with you working for the firm, too, well... I just thought it would be too hard to hide."

Mike nodded, smiling as Harvey's arms were wrapping around him. He sank into the hug and it was one of relief, comfort.

"There was something else, too, Mike," Harvey said. He was smiling and Mike knew it couldn't be anything terrible.

"Yeah?"

"Well, I just wanted you to know something," Harvey said as he ran one hand up Mike's back to stroke his cheek. "I'm different with you around clients and I just wanted to make sure you knew how I felt. I've loved having you with me these last three weeks, it's been amazing. I've loved every moment."

"Me too, Harvey," Mike said, resting his head in that gap between Harvey's neck and shoulder that seemed like it was made for him.

"Mike..." Harvey paused for a moment, just long enough to press a small kiss onto his head. "I love you."

For a second, he was speechless. He was just smiling and opening his mouth to speak with no words. Mike could heart his heart beating and then he felt Harvey tense and he knew he had to speak.

"I love you too," he whispered into Harvey's ear.

"Damn, Mike, I though I'd said it too soon."

"Sorry, I was just happy."

"I mean it, you know," Harvey said and there was no way Mike could doubt it, not when he kissed him like he did.

"I know, I meant it too," Mike replied. "Now, let's go send those emails."


End file.
